Allegiant: Alternate Ending
by PurplePhoenix98
Summary: An alternate ending to the last book in the Divergent Trilogy. The title pretty much says it all. (I don't own the image)
1. End of Fifty One

**Allegiant: Alternate Ending**

**(A/N: Hello, So I finished Allegiant and, as much as I loved the rest of the series, I was very upset with the ending! I have much respect for Veronica Roth and her books but I have taken it upon myself to write an alternate ending to make myself (and anyone who disliked the ending too) feel better. Enjoy!)**

Where You Should Leave Off:

Page 489:

"What is it?" I say

Cara shakes her head.

"Where's Tris?" I say.

My Ending:

**End of Fifty One**

**Tobias**

Cara just kept staring down at her shoes and I was starting to get annoyed.

"For God's sake Cara! You're being ridiculous! Where is Tris!" screamed Christina.

"Tobias I'm sorry. Something happened when her and Caleb went down to the Weapon's Lab. Tris ended up going in instead of Caleb. She survived the death serum but David was waiting for her when she got through. She managed to release the memory serum but he shot her before she could stop him" she said.

For a minute I just stood there in shock. Cara probably expected me to lash out because she just stood there staring at me expectantly, but all I could do was stand there in silence.

"Is she..." but I couldn't bring myself to say the words.

"No. Some of the doctors took her into surgery a few hours ago" her voice faltered on the last words.

"That's impossible" I said flatly, "If Tris released the memory serum then none of the surgeons would be able to remember what a surgery is let alone how to perform one".

"I know that. But as soon as she left Caleb, he went back to the lab He, Matthew and I had been working in, to get more of the inoculation serum. He used it on some of the surgeons before the memory serum could get too far. He has basically been holding them at gun point since then" she paused to let me process then continued, "Please don't get your hopes up, it's a long shot".

I stood still, trying to process all of it. I probably should have run to the hospital, but all I could do was stand there and listen to the pounding in my ears. Why would _she_ go in Caleb's place? She wouldn't do that. But I knew she would. No matter how much she hated Caleb on the surface she still loved him. She would rather die herself than see more of her family die.

I looked at Christina to see how she was reacting. She looked back at me in shock but then a look of grief crossed her face. We stood looking at each other for a moment, but then she just took off, to the hospital I assumed. I stared at her as she ran off down one of the hallways and thought about following her, but I stopped myself before I could get too far.

Tris is in surgery fighting for her life. I didn't know if I could stand at the observation window like some useless bystander and watch her life slip away. If she died in there, and I had to watch, I don't know how I would deal with it or even if could. I had seen it plenty of times in my fear landscape and it terrified me more than anything, but in the end I always knew I would wake up from it. I knew that I could go to her and feel her arms around my waist when I woke up. But this was different. If I saw her die, and knew that it was something I couldn't wake up from, knew that I would never feel her arms slide around my waist again, I didn't know if I could deal with that.

Cara put her hand on my arm, and for a minute it felt like the way Tris used to, and it reminded me of her, which felt wrong. I shrugged her off and started walking in the direction of the hospital.


	2. Fifty Two

**Fifty Two**

**Tobias**

When I got to the hospital I had gone straight to the section where Uriah's room was. The surgeons had Tris in the one right next to his, and I found Christina staring through the observation window with her arms crossed in front of her. I stood next to her but I had my back to the window so I couldn't see in. My last memory of Tris wasn't going to be one of her lying in a hospital bed. Besides, that wasn't why I was here.

"Where is Caleb?" I asked her.

"He's just inside the door. When I first got here he was standing here with his gun. He told me that he wanted to make sure the surgeons didn't try to leave and inoculate David or something" she said with a shaky voice.

"Why wouldn't he be inside? They could just be standing around?" I said incredulously.

"That's what I said to him, well more yelled. He said he felt guilty, and that he didn't want to look at what he'd done, but I told him he was being a coward and that he deserved it, and that he owed it to her to at least make sure _somebody_ was trying to keep her alive, because he sure wasn't".

I just nodded to her then walked away from the observation window and flung the door open to find Caleb standing there with his back to it. I pushed him forward into the room and followed behind him. He turned around surprised, but then looked afraid when he saw it was me. I walked toward him and ripped the gun from him then pointed it at the surgeons. I kept my face on Caleb, so I couldn't see Tris.

"Tell me exactly what happened" I spat at him.

At first I wasn't sure he was going to answer, but eventually he found the words. As he was telling me what happened, I kept clenching and unclenching my fists, resisting the urge to punch him in the jaw. Even if he did believe she could survive the death serum, I couldn't believe that he was willing to take the chance. Tris was right, maybe he had already died.

"I swear to you I didn't want her to go, but she said she would've shot me in the leg and taken it if I didn't give it to her. I figured if I gave it to her, then there was a better chance of me being able to help her. I knew she was strong and thought that maybe she could survive the serum, but there was no way I could've been sure of that, so I gave her the backpack. When she shot the guards, the way was clear for me to go back, and then I went to go find the serum to inoculate the surgeons".

My resolve almost broke and I almost punched him. _She_ was brave enough to fight her way through the death serum, not even knowing if she would come out the other side. _And _she ended up getting shot, and he has the nerve to say something like that?

"Well how convenient for you that Tris shot the guards before she walked to her death!" I seethed.

"I never meant it like that. I would've fought my way through hundreds of guards if I had to. I don't care if she thinks I'm a traitor, or a coward I would never sit on the side lines and watch her sacrifice herself for me! I did it once, and it was the worst thing I have ever and will ever do!"

"Tris might not make it through this Caleb. She had to put her _life_ on the line, for you to realize that you are supposed to be her brother!? That is more than just cowardly." and I stormed out of the room and past Christina who had returned to watching the surgery.

I found myself back in the dormitory, pacing back and forth across the floor. I knew it was stupid, and I knew that I should've been with Tris, but there had to be something I could do! Even when we were stuck in Erudite headquarters, completely separated from each other, I was able to do something. I found her, and I had a plan to get her out of there alive. In the end though, it wasn't me who saved her, and maybe it was the same now. Maybe I couldn't save her like I thought I could.

"You know, she might not be around for that much longer. Are you sure you want to sit here alone, while she's in the hospital?" I looked up to find Christina in the doorway. Her eyes were red, but she looked determined now.

"And what would that do? How would that help, huh?"

"You know Tobias, when I first met you I thought you were nothing but a militarized robot, there to make initiation that much harder for everyone. And you know what? Everyone agreed with me, except for Tris. Of course, she never told me for sure but I could tell. You pushed her harder than everyone else and she never complained about it. I think that was because it always made her work harder when she did. It made her want to prove she was Dauntless worthy-"

"But she always was," I interrupted, "At first when she hit the net all I saw was a gray blur. And when I helped her down I noticed how small she was. She was completely ordinary, except for the fact that she jumped first. She was Abnegation, a Stiff, she was supposed to be uncomfortable with even looking in the mirror. But she jumped first. Even I didn't do that. She was always a Dauntless!"

"Exactly! She's a warrior! She always has been! Tris had to kill one of her best friends, Tobias. I don't know that many people would be strong enough to do that. She can make it through this."

I finally looked up at her, "You heard Cara."

"Yeah I did. But Will was Cara's sister, and as much as she thinks she's forgiven Tris completely, she hasn't. Cara is an Erudite, and always has been an Erudite in her heart. But because of that she has always been controlled by her brain. She is all about calculations and facts, and in her head she knew it was dumb to be mad at Tris because she knew it wasn't her fault. But in her heart she loved Will more, and there will always be tension between them because of that."

"So you're saying Cara wants her to die?!" I asked incredulously

"No, I'm saying that Cara doesn't know Tris like we do because even if she doesn't know it, there will always be that tension between them. And that thought in the back of her mind saying 'she killed Will' will always be in the way. She doesn't know what a fighter Tris is."

I stood there and stared at Christina for a minute before replying, "You know, Dauntless initiate or not you really are a born Candor." then I turned and took off out of the dormitory.

**(A/N: Keep watching for the next Chapter, and review, review, review!)**


	3. Fifty Three

**Fifty Three**

**Tobias**

At that moment, what I wanted more than anything else was to go through my fear landscape. Despite not being able to get rid of any of my fears, they were still familiar to me. I knew how to deal with them, one step at a time. First, heights; then claustrophobia; then killing the innocent; then facing my father. I imagined that the innocent would probably look like Uriah now, whereas they usually looked like Tris.

It was strange, but I wanted to feel that fear. The fear that gave you an adrenaline rush from being on a high bridge, or almost getting crushed to death. It would be better than _this _kind of fear. The feeling of uncertainty, emptiness, loneliness, and dread. I ended a friends life because of my insecurities, the person I loved the most in the world might die on me, and nobody in my home town even knew me anymore. It was selfish to think about myself, but I was entirely alone in the world. Every time I thought about it, it was like getting the air ripped from my lungs. In combat, it was always best to go for someone's throat or stomach because you could knock the wind out of them and get your chance, and that's exactly how I felt, except this time, I couldn't seem to get the air back. I was grateful to Christina for trying to help me, but I'd known all those things about Tris for a while now. Of course, there were always moments when she doubted herself, like when she gave herself up to Jeanine, but in the end Tris always fought. Besides, I had never been a Candor, nobody had ever been so honest with me before. It was a lot to have to take in, and I desperately needed familiarity. Maybe that's why I found myself here.

The gym in the Bureau was so much different than the training room back at Dauntless. The training area in Dauntless had punching bags, a running track, targets, and mats for fighting, not to mention it was underground. Meanwhile, everything here was so much more sophisticated. They had machines for everything. One for running, one for lifting weights, some of them I couldn't even begin to imagine what they were for, and I knew it was stupid but it made me mad. Everything in the Bureau was so different and there was so much I didn't understand here. In Dauntless I worked in intelligence, I knew everything about everything. Here I felt like there were a million things I had to relearn, and because of that, everyone who had been living here their whole lives all seemed condescending to me. There was one similarity that I appreciated greatly though, and that was the punching bags.

I had been standing here for over an hour, going over drills and perfecting my fighting technique, not that I would need any of that anymore, but it was nice to do something I knew. Every hit felt like an attack on the enemy. Now that there was finally something of substance I could deal with, I thought I would start to feel better.

"You know, distracting yourself won't help. Believe me, I've tried" suddenly Caleb appeared behind the punching bag and held it in place.

"What are you doing here?" I spat, "You should be in the hospital, with Tris."

"To be fair, you should be too. But...Tris is actually the reason I'm here."

"I am not talking about her, with you, Caleb."

"Listen, before she went into the vault, there was something she wanted me to tell you, you know...in case she didn't make it."

At that I stopped my attack and looked at him. This definitely wasn't what I was expecting. I thought he would march in here and ask me if we could be friends, and give me the 'it's what she would have wanted' speech. But the words 'in case she didn't make it' struck me like a blow to the head.

"What do you mean, 'in case she didn't make it'? You're trying to tell me she's..."

"No! The surgery is over but now they're just waiting to see if it worked. I figured telling you now would be better than telling you if and when she's actually gone." he said slowly.

"What is it?" I knew I was being to harsh on him. But every time I looked at him, all I could see was the coward who didn't fight for her.

"She wanted me to tell you that she didn't want to leave you." I immediately understood. Tris wanted me to know that she wanted to live. She didn't want to die like she wanted to back in Erudite. She didn't give up, she fought, like always.

"Thanks, Caleb" I murmured.

I didn't need the 'it's what she would have wanted' speech, because I already knew. She forgave Caleb, and she was willing to die so he could live. I would probably always feel like that was an unfair trade but maybe I could learn not to hate Caleb. I would always feel like it should've been him, but it wasn't fair to make him suffer forever. After all, I was just as guilty as he was. Somebody was lying in a hospital bed because of me right now too.

"I'm going to try to forgive you".

He breathed out a visible sigh of relief and I couldn't help but smirk. I also couldn't help but wonder why he was so relieved. It's not like I forgave him or ever would.

"Tobias, now that the surgery is over they're letting people in to see her. I know you might think that distracting yourself is what you want but...listen I'm in no position to judge but...you should go see her; she would do it for you." he said.

I thought about it, and as much as I hated it, he was right, she would've done it for me and I was being selfish.

I took a deep breath in and nodded to myself, but he must've took it as a response because he nodded back and silently left the room. I turned back to the punching bag and hit it one last time before I left the gym.

I went back to the hospital and headed down the familiar path I'd taken so many times to Uriah's room. When I found myself in front of his room, I stopped to look in.

"They're unplugging him tomorrow".

"What?!" I whipped around to find Zeke standing and staring in at his brother. I hadn't even noticed him standing there.

"Yeah. Apparently there is no hope for him to ever wake up so they don't want to use hospital resources for no reason." I couldn't even look at him.

"This is all my fault, Zeke. I'm sorry."

"Tobias you've apologized too many times for me to count. I don't blame you anymore and neither does my mom."

"You should. You both should."

"You didn't come here to argue with me. Just go, Tobias". Hearing him say that only made me feel worse because he didn't even sound angry. I would've preferred that. Angry I could deal with. Instead he just sounded like he felt bad for me, which I definitely didn't deserve.

I turned and walked away without another word and started picking up speed, desperate to get away. It didn't last long though, because when I got to Tris's room I hesitated at the door. This wasn't something I could just walk right into. I knew it was stupid, because I knew she could get through this. Yet, she was still a person and just because I thought she was a fighter didn't mean she had a better chance than anybody else. Regardless, I opened the door, and she was the first thing I saw, so there wouldn't be anymore stalling.

At first I was afraid to go near her, because I wasn't used to seeing her look vulnerable, but I slowly made my way across the room. My eyes trailed over her body before I could bring myself to look at her face. She was wearing a long hospital gown, her hair was splayed wildly around her pillow, and her chest was rising and falling with steady breaths. Had I not known any better I would've said she was asleep, she looked so at peace. Finally, I found it in me to look up at her face. I thought it would be hard to look up and see her eyes closed and her face unmoving, that I would be disturbed at the sight of her stillness. I thought I would look at her and I wouldn't see anything. I thought it would be like she had already gone, but I was wrong. When I looked up I saw Tris. The same Tris that jumped first, the same Tris that braved Jeanine, the same Tris that braved death. She was right here in front of me. I might've even been glad, except one of her doctors came rushing in.

"Might I ask who you are?" the tall man wondered politely.

"I'm her...uh...I'm Four, well Tobias."

"Oh, Mr. Eaton. Caleb told me I might be seeing you."

"Unfortunately, he didn't tell me _I_ would be seeing _you_." I said rudely.

"Yes, well we didn't expect to get her test results back so quickly."

"And?!" I demanded angrily. Why was this man so slow, and tedious, and aggravating?

"Unfortunately, Mr. Eaton, we can't give her test results to anyone until we've spoken to a member of her family first. So, until Caleb returns..."

"LISTEN to me! Caleb is not her family! Do you understand?!"

The doctor was taken aback by my sudden outrage. But he understood.

"Mr. Eaton. It's good news."

**(A/N: So I know this chapter was a quick, but it was definitely important! Thanks to everyone who reviewed and to everyone who followed! I really appreciate it!)**


	4. Fifty Four

**Fifty Four**

**Tobias**

When he told me he couldn't give me any details he wasn't kidding. No matter what I did he wouldn't tell me what would happen to Tris. I stayed in the hospital almost all night, I knew I should've gone to get Caleb right away but I really didn't want to admit that his presence was necessary.

It was enraging that everyone's life was changing so drastically yet here was this doctor, still set on following some dumb rule. He probably grew up in the Bureau with his parents and siblings. He probably went to school with all his friends, and got a degree in science. He probably had a picture perfect life filled with cushy rules, like this one, that he had to follow. It was tiring trying to get him to see things from my perspective, and since he wouldn't tell me anything I had no choice.

I figured he wouldn't still be in the gym (just a hunch) so I went back to the lab where he had been working. I realized that that's where Caleb had been spending most of his time since he talked to me in the gym. When he told me that he had tried to distract himself too, I figured the lab is what he'd been talking about. I had only been there a few times so it took me a while to find it, but when I got there I discovered I'd been right. He was standing at the lab table staring down into a microscope.

"You need to get back to the hospital".

He looked up at me surprised, but it wasn't long before his face changed to a look of worry, "Why? Is she okay?"

"Yeah, they just got her test results back".

"And?" he said anxiously.

For a minute I let myself feel that flare of hope again. When the doctor first told me it was good news I didn't do anything. I had been preparing myself for something like 'I'm sorry Mr. Eaton' not 'it's good news'.

"They won't tell me anything because I'm not a member of her family".

"That seems a little stupid if you ask me" and he looked back down at the microscope.

"Caleb I didn't come to tell you bad news. It's good news, they just won't tell me any details until you're there".

He didn't even look back at me when he turned to leave the lab, "Hey!", I put my hand on his shoulder and turned him around, "I also wanted you to know that just because I'm going to _attempt_ to forget about what a coward you are, for Tris' sake, does not mean you will ever be her family. You may be blood, but you're not family".

"Get off of me Tobias" he shook me off and disappeared from the lab. I was about to follow him but I was curious. I went over to the desk where he was standing and peered down into the microscope. At first I thought I had adjusted the focus accidentally because I couldn't see anything, but then I realized he didn't even have a slide on the stage. I turned and left the lab without another thought.

I never caught up to Caleb, but he was already talking to the doctor when I got back, "You're absolutely sure?".

"Yes, I checked twice".

"Thank you", the two of them shook hands and Caleb came over to me. It was impossible for me to read his face because he looked very guarded.

"She's going to wake up Tobias. Actually she should wake up pretty soon. They fixed all the damaged caused by the bullets, now she just needs to recover".

"You're sure? She's going to wake up?"

"Yes Tobias, that's what I was asking him when you walked in" he snapped impatiently.

"What's your problem now Caleb?"

"_You _won't understand".

"Why don't you give it a shot anyway?!" I shouted. I was starting to get sick of Caleb. He was a nuisance.

"I'm not going to do this with you Tobias".

"Do what, _Caleb_?" I spat his name like it was an insult.

"I won't stand here and argue with you! I'm tired of you, Christina, and everyone else telling me that I'm not her family. I'm tired of people constantly reminding me that every time I'm around Beatrice I ruin her life. I gave her to Jeanine, I let her take my place in the vault, and worst of all I didn't protect the one time she needed it most".

"Which was when?"

"When she came to visit me in Erudite, back before I knew she was Divergent."

"What?" I was genuinely confused.

"Let me finish. She told me that she didn't belong in Dauntless, that she couldn't fit in. I had no idea what she meant, I thought she had finally come to her senses about how insane it was for her to pick Dauntless. Anyway, I told her that she had to fit in because it was her only option. She couldn't go home, and it's not like she could have changed factions. She _had_ to stay at Dauntless".

"It sounds like you did what could to me" I snapped.

"No I didn't. I should've taken her more seriously. I should have tried to help her get out of Dauntless. If she had left Dauntless nobody would have discovered that she was Divergent and none of us would be here. _You_ wouldn't be here".

"_Me?_ Don't try to pawn this off on me Caleb."

"What? You honestly thought you were protecting her when you were throwing knives at her?! When you let that moron Peter, beat her black and blue?! You're lucky it was Uriah you blew up and not her. I bet you would feel a lot worse about it if it was Beatrice they were unplugging today!" he shouted.

The next thing I knew Caleb was on the floor, his eye turning blue and his face was bleeding. I looked down at my knuckles and they were already bruising.

Just then, Christina walked into the room, "Tobias the doctors are - what the hell did you do?"

Christina was staring at me with an incredulous look on her face, "You can't take all this out on him! Tris chose to take his place, and it wasn't his fault. You may be right about him being a coward, but he didn't deserve that".

How could she defend him? They're unplugging Uriah today and he has the nerve to say something like that? And... "They're unplugging him now, aren't they?".

"Yeah. They are".

"Then we need to go. Screw Caleb." and I stormed out of Tris' room.

I turned the corner and stood at the window to Uriah's room. Zeke and Hana were already there. She was leaning against her son's shoulder, tears welling up in her eyes.

I didn't realize what a dumb idea this was until I saw his family standing there. I'm the one who put him here and to stand here and watch this happen would be awful. I turned to leave but Hana saw me before I could get very far.

"Tobias, come here." she said firmly, "I'm tired of seeing you look so guilty. Uriah wouldn't have wanted you to blame yourself, and he wouldn't have wanted us to blame you either. He also would have wanted you to stay," and she placed her hand on my arm and stood next to me.

Soon, a group of doctors ushered us into the room and we all gathered around the table he was laying on. Hana kissed Uriah's his forehead and went over to hug Zeke, who was trying not to cry, probably for her sake. Then the room went quiet and it suddenly started to feel tense. Zeke took a step toward Uriah and cleared his throat once, twice, three times before he finally started to talk.

"So I guess I need to say goodbye. This really sucks", he cleared his throat again, "because we've always been there for each other. I remember when Dad left, you were too young to really understand what was going on and you came into my room after dinner and asked me when he was coming home. I sat you down on the floor beside me and told you that we wouldn't ever see him again but that that was okay because we were Dauntless and we were strong so we didn't need him".

The steady beeping of the machines in the back of the room filled the temporary silence. Zeke had his eyes squeezed shut and his jaw was locked. He started clenching and unclenching his fist at his side when he started to talk again.

"I completely freaked out, and started shouting about how pissed _I _was. You waited for me to relax and then stood beside me and told me that I was right. That it didn't matter if dad was gone because we _were _strong but not because we were Dauntless but because we were brothers. And you said that no matter what happened we would always be there for each other". He started to cry then, "You were always there for me Uriah, but I wasn't there for you...and now here we are. We're brothers and I let you down. I wasn't there to protect you like we always promised and look where it got us...I'm sorry brother. Goodbye forever". Then he stepped back toward Hana and she wiped the tears streaming down his cheeks. They hugged each other for a few minutes before stepping back to face Uriah. The doctor asked if they were ready and Hana nodded.

"Goodbye" I said, and the doctor unplugged the machine keeping him alive.

The beeping started to slow and finally it came to a stop. It was replaced by a horrible humming sound instead. Hana turned and hugged Zeke. She cried into his shoulder and Zeke just hugged her back in silence. All I could do was stand there in shock. I knew it was coming but now that he was really gone I couldn't believe it. I didn't know what to do so I just turned and left. It seems like I had been doing that a lot lately. If you looked up the definition of fight or flight in the dictionary my picture would be there. If I could fight against the enemy I would but when there was nothing for me to punch I just ran for it. I guess I was never a true Dauntless, not that it really mattered any more.

The rest of the day was a blur. I didn't notice anything because nothing else seemed worth noticing. I walked around aimlessly until I got tired and then I went to bed. I tossed and turned for hours and when I finally fell asleep I kept having the same awful nightmare. Caleb would shoot Tris and she would die and then I would retaliate by stabbing Uriah in the chest. Then, I would realize what I had done and stab myself too. I never actually saw myself die but I knew I had because the last thing I would see was my own blood. Yeah, if only it was that easy.


	5. Fifty Five

**Fifty Five**

**Tris**

There is no white and black. Only grey. People think that there is a big difference between light and dark, but there isn't. In every darkness there is light somewhere and in every light there is darkness. The only way to choose between the two is to pick the one that _feels_ right. You can _try_ to see with your eyes but keeping them closed is better. You can weigh the options in your mind forever and never come up with the right answer. At first I thought it was difficult, but now I know it's easy to choose when you know who you are.

My whole life, people had been telling me what to be. My parents always told me I needed to be selfless, and to think of others. My faction told me I had to be a warrior. The Allegiance told me I had to be a proud divergent. The Bureau told me I had to be perfect. But when it all comes down it there are no labels, all you're left with is you.

After all that happened I figured out that life is more difficult than death. It is hard to have to fight so hard for such a long time and not want to give up. For a while I did want to give up, but I realized that there is no point in fighting so hard if you don't get to experience the result. Maybe in my lifetime I wouldn't make a big difference but how could I know for sure if I give up?

So even though I knew I could be with my parents again, and I could be totally serene. I knew that would be making the wrong decision.

I opened my eyes.

**(A/N: So I felt like this moment needed a part of its own because I really want to do the character justice. That's why it's so short.)**


	6. Fifty Six

**Fifty Six**

**Tris**

The first thing I noticed was the beeping of the machines in the room. I grounded myself to the steady noise. I knew that any second, doctors would come bursting in and interrupt the calm. I kept my gaze stuck on the ceiling and breathed in the quiet. Then, a man in a white jacket swung the door open.

He came over to my bedside and gave me a polite smile, "Hello Ms. Prior. It's nice to formally meet you".

I could tell his pleasantries weren't exactly sincere, but he seemed friendly enough so I tried to nod a greeting back to him. He reminded me a lot of Jack Kang in that he was very official and businesslike. He droned about my condition and injuries for a while, but I wasn't listening. I couldn't. I hadn't moved in days but I felt more tired than I had during my first week of Dauntless initiation. It hurt to breathe in, and my shoulder ached like someone was setting it on fire from the inside. I was uncomfortable and in pain, and irritated at his talking but I was grateful that he didn't stop. Grateful because I knew that when he stopped and realized that I was alright (mostly), my brother would come in not long after.

It was stupid for me to be nervous to see Caleb but, regardless of that, I was. I couldn't explain it, but the thought of seeing him again made me feel awful. Maybe it was because with Caleb, I never know what to expect. I thought I got him back once before and he turned out to be helping Jeanine. When I thought he was betraying me and encouraging me to pick Abnegation, it turned out he only wanted me to know that he supported whatever I chose. So when I saw him again, I couldn't be prepared. I couldn't be prepared for anger, for regret, for total impartiality, for anything.

"Ms. Prior, your vitals seem to be fairly regular. You are very lucky," he paused and smiled at me, "if there isn't anything else you need, I should go alert your family that you're awake".

I took a deep breath, which he must have taken as my consent, because he nodded and left the room after that. I closed my eyes and kept breathing deeply until I heard the door slowly squeak open again. I didn't open my eyes until I heard his voice, "Beatrice?".

He looked exactly the same except he had a black eye. I was going to comment, but I realized it wasn't very important.

The silence hang heavy in the room, and I didn't want to be the one to break it. Luckily I didn't have to, "Beatrice I apologize for this. I realize that you are here because of me, and I realize that our relationship can't ever be the same. I just want you to know that I am glad you are okay".

I slowly sat up and looked him in the eye, "Caleb I'm not okay".

"Our parents," he said looking at the floor.

"No, I'm talking about you and me. Ever since I chose Dauntless and you chose Erudite, we haven't been the same. When they said 'faction before blood' all those times, it wasn't a rule, it was a warning. They knew it would happen. We would pick up the ideals of our own factions and our families wouldn't be the same anymore. That is exactly what happened to us. In the beginning, when I came to you for help in Erudite you turned me away."

"Beatrice I never meant to hurt you," he said.

"I know you didn't. You thought you were doing what was right and so did I. Faction before blood doesn't mean we _care_ about our faction more, it means we are more _like_ our faction. Caleb I didn't take your place because I wanted to die, or because I thought you were taking pity on me. I did it because no matter how different we are, and how different we will get, you are my brother and I love you."

"I thought you said-"

"I am not okay Caleb, because the second you came in here you said that you thought I was in here because of you, and that makes me mad. I am in here because of me".

He came over to my bedside and hugged me a little awkwardly. It was difficult to get around the arm sling and all the wires but it was okay because it was Caleb.

"Beatrice, I need to go talk to the doctor," I almost laughed at him. His aversion to all things emotional was so familiar I couldn't help but smile. He didn't notice, "I need to find out how much longer you need to stay here, what prescriptions you will need, and figure out some other details," he stood up and smiled down at me before heading toward the door. He had his hand on the knob when he said, "Can he come in? He's waiting outside".

I didn't have to ask who he meant. I knew that I was going to have to face this moment eventually. Besides, I think a part of me knew that he had been waiting. I nodded at Caleb and he left the room. When he did, my heart started pounding, and when the doorknob started to turn again I thought I could hear it. _Thud thud thud_. The door swung open. _Thud thud thud._ Finally he stepped into the room, and when I met his gaze I didn't really know what to do. I wanted him to understand, and I wanted him to be okay with my choice but I didn't know that he was. For a minute we just stared at each other, but I couldn't take the silence like I could with Caleb.

"Tobias, I want you to know that I didn't want to leave you. I told Caleb to tell you this, just in case, but I need to say this in person. I never wanted to leave. I only ever wanted to protect what little family I had left. No matter how many times he betrayed us, Caleb is still my brother and I had to know that he would be okay".

He exhaled before he started, "Tris you have no idea how...lost I felt. I know, and I've always known that you are a soldier. You never stop fighting no matter what happens, but you got tired of fighting before".

"I won't lie to you, I thought about staying with my parents. No more wars, or hate, or corruption. Just me and parents, watching over Caleb and you and Chris from somewhere quiet. But I _did_ fight so hard I guess it just felt like it would have all been for nothing. Besides, I couldn't leave you," I looked down at my hands and started playing with the end of the sheet that covered my body, "I know that you would have moved on eventually, maybe gotten a job at the Bureau or something, but I'm selfish. I love you Tobias".

He came over to me and lifted my head so I was looking him right in the eye, "I love you, Tris. I missed you so much," he smirked and took my face in his hands. I leaned up toward him and he came down to meet me. Our lips met and it was soft but sure. When I broke away he looked surprised, but I took his hand and pulled him down so he was sitting next to me. I wrapped my arms around him and rested my head on his shoulder. He wrapped his arms around me and we just stayed like that, holding each other close. Being wrapped in his arms was so familiar. It was like coming home after a long time away, and breathing in the familiar air.

"For the record, Tris, Caleb is not your only family".

I held him closer, wanting to never let go again.


End file.
